I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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