Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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