maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
