doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
