Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
