There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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