your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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