You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
