The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize