I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
last night I used snow as a chaser
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
