Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
