I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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