If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize