after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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