I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize