no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
