two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
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