Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
