Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
