What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize