Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
