I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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