found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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