WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
Your mouth is God's brothel.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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