What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize