And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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