Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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