I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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