I hate all girls vehemently.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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