We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
