Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
