Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
