i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Randomize
