There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
he was CRYING into my vagina
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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