I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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