And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
