How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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