I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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