You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize