just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize