Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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