butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
