Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
accomplished twins. life is a go
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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