Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
