even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
