People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
