Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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