i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize