Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
