So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
