dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
