Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize